I recently found myself in a heart breaking, heart ripped out of your chest kinda moment. I needed someone I could talk to and lean on. Someone to just tell me it would be OK and that I would make it through this muddy mess in my heart. I wandered aimlessly and found myself at the doorstep of a friend who I have had for many years. The kind of friend you check in on every now and then. The occasional text message or lunch date. The kind of pal who shows up to your birthday parties and is there in the background of your everyday life.
We spent the rest of the afternoon talking about the bad the ugly and the messy of what I was going through. Tears were falling but we found laughter and we found each other again. A very obvious moment that I needed to be in her life and her in mine. I left her apt and realized how much this person means to me. How much I truly love her and her friendship…and her cooking! Such an amazing human that crossed my path and is on a life journey with me. Even if it is once in a while and not more often then I would like. She helped band-aid the hurt! It got me thinking of what an authentic connection is and how we can have more with the people who cross our paths…..and more often.
First be a good listener: You know those people who you tell a story to and they seem distracted or? It’s sux! Don’t be that person. Listen with your heart, your ears and with every fiber. FOCUS! 😉
Show kindness. We all have untold stories. Every one is fighting their own battle. EV-ER-Y person. Offer kindness and grant them patience and grace just as you wish they would you.
Ask sincere questions. As you intently listen to others, hopefully you will cross into a world called curiosity. It’s ok to ask them questions.
Empathy is a strength. Show compassion. Be understanding and warm. Listen without mentally criticizing the things she tells you. And, friends…do not judge.